Mainstream Dysfunctional

I want to be dysfunctional just like you

I know I’m dysfunctional in my own way too

But my kind of dysfunctional, just won’t do

I need to be dysfunctional, just like you

You’re mainstream dysfunctional, that’s what you are

You may be out of whack, but you seem to be on par

With the rest of the screwed up, sozzled planet

You’re so well aligned; tell me, did you plan it?

You’re mainstream dysfunctional, in everything you do

It seems like the same things I do, but something’s askew

You’re completely besotted, with one thing, and then the next

And at the same time you’re so unbelievably detached; it leaves me very vexed

Your life is an open door, but I can’t come in

You tell me I’m not losing, but there’s no way I can win

You’re sort of okay with the way you are, except you can’t stand it

And there’s nothing you want to do, not even understand it

You’d rather not disturb the status quo

Let the dust settle on it until you can’t see it anymore

You act like you’re fine, and maybe you are

There’s no way for me to tell while standing so far

And there are a thousand other quirks you’re allowed

The thousand perks you share with the crowd

And the dysfunctional way in which you deal with things

And how the dysfunctionality gives you wings

You get to think you’re alone, when you’re not

You get to be oblivious of the common plot

You believe that these experiences are only for you

It’s all part of the mainstream view

And while I get this all in theory, and used to practice some of it too

I don’t feel as comfortable with it, as you

There’s this stagnancy in that way of dysfunction, one that I abhor

There’s this forever and ever quality, one that I yearn for

I can’t want to be functional; it’s too much to ask

And working towards it is an uphill task

But mainstream dysfunctional seems like a feasible goal

I know it can’t be that hard, to be an asshole

And so I want to be dysfunctional just like you

The kind of dysfunctional that’s good for you

My kind, certainly isn't working out

At least not as long as yours is up and about